Also royally fucking up la dee fuckin da & the most boring twitter on earth
Remember kids, questions & cool stuff - apocalypsepie.com/askDon’t tweet shit about smoking meth. Your mom’s on twitter nowdays and you’re still not sure she’s recovered after finding out that you’ve touched boy’s wieners.
Machine Gun Fellatio - Rollercoaster
Still the best band name EVER.
Ex tweaker. Kept the cleanest goddamn house known to single mankind. Purveyor of assorted heavy duty pharmaceuticals & some truly awesome weed. Rad make out buddy but close to ruined mechanics downstairs. Only dude I’ve ever had to quit mid blow; if shit had taken any longer someone woulda filed a missing persons report.
Fucking amphetamines.
Goddamn. Sick of squinting & kinda terrified of getting wrinkles so booking an eye test.
Fuck I hope smart-assed, dirty mouthed dorky chicks with glasses still get laid.
Jane’s Addiction - Ain’t No Right
4 of my ex’s have been/are in hardcore bands (most of them shitty). Another one co-owns a hardcore label. That’s a standing count of 5. These aren’t just the usual ‘thanks for last night’ guys either, these are 5 guys I have actively dated. And I don’t really ‘date’ a whole lotta dudes. Two I grew up with. One I moved states for. One I agreed to marry (long story).
So what does this mean?
Apparently I like dirty men who rarely shower, have lots of tattoos & little to no musical ability. If I knew any better, I’d have probably have lost all respect for myself by now.
Also kids, that is exactly why you should always have regular STD tests.