Also royally fucking up la dee fuckin da & the most boring twitter on earth
Remember kids, questions & cool stuff - apocalypsepie.com/ask
Ergh. Stalker chick is really starting to get on my nerves.
Fucking drama queen. Go peddle your batshit insanity somewhere else. Your friendly local mental ward for instance. I only hope you like soft walls, intravenous injections & foods that come in liquid form.
For the love of christ somebody medicate this bitch already.
Course it kinda depends on what your question was.
Got a lotta questions? Try a fucktonne lotta drugs. Go, knock yourself out. I’m sure you’ll work something out in the end.
Either way, chances are you’ll fuck off & stop bothering me.
GPOY: t-shirt edition (Via suicidewatch)
Meanwhile, Iggy & me are heading out for Berocca. Don’t ask.
Grinspoon - 1000 Miles
well i got drunk and i got stoned,
shot my family left my home
went out on a killing spree
cause what you did was fucked to me
I like Grinspoon. Firstly they’ve got a fucking kickass band name. Okay Phil Jamieson gives off a bucketful of royally fucked up vibes & always has, his meth addiction surely hasn’t make him any more interesting or less of a bit of a cunt. And even though last time anyone heard anything from them they’d kinda been sucked into the bland generic ‘rock band’ mould, shit like 1000 Miles makes up for pretty much EVERYTHING.
It’s kinda like the ideal song to drive fast & do really bad drugs too. Which of course means it’s fucking rad.
This can only mean that the US Navy has another tincan full of sailors set to dock. Rad. Prepare for the city to be conspicuously absent of women who don’t find the term ‘drunken scragwhore’ an insult. The initiated among us stock up and stay home. The greenhorn girls? Poor silly bitches, they don’t even see that shit coming.
But if you’re a hooker - MOTHERFUCKIN JACKPOT.
After having our son (3 months ago) my girlfriend doesn’t want to have sex. When do you think she’ll want to get dirty again?
Dude. Really? You try shitting something watermelon sized outta something smaller than your average household drain then get back to me.
But you wanna get right back on that horse now doncha? You poor mouth-breathing retard, you should be praying that she doesn’t stab you in the face while you sleep. My advice is to keep low, keep quiet & jerk off like a 13 year old with a new Target underwear catalogue; furtive yet furiously.
And when mommy dearest finally does have the last remnants of stupid suckled outta her & allows you to violate her baby hole once again, for the love of all things fucking holy, WEAR A GODDAMN RUBBER. Fuck, throw on another 3 or 4 just to be sure. Then maybe you can save us all from being further exposed to your spawn while you’re at it. I mean, you don’t see me parading a gooey, dribbling mound of my shit around in public. Why should your bodily outbursts be allowed to grow up, rape & pillage the remainder of intelligent culture & hoover up what’s left of the breathable air? If people like you continue to be allowed to reproduce, soon enough we’ll be knee deep in dopey, sumo sized little fuckers buying truckfulls of soulless, vapid mass marketed garbage, sparking an industry of massive over consumption & all fuelled by 12 year olds with the burning intellect of your average houseplant.
That’s already happened? Oh, right. See, I told you. You & your boner sir, have damned us all.
Atari Teenage Riot - Activate
Atari Teenage Riot are making new music. This makes me happier than Tila Tequila in a room full of drunks with singles. Because ATR are uber awesome. And fuck, it’s only taken them oh, 10 goddamn years to pull shit together.
What’s interesting is that Herr Empire & co are shacking up with CX KiDTRONiK these days; you know, seeing as Carl Crack (un)surprisingly OD’ed back in 2001 & kinda took all the fun outta making kickass music to break shit to. But, taking this as a sign of things to come, KiD ain’t that bad a choice. Empire & Endo? Still super rad. This time it just seems a little more… polished than the usual meaty chunks of abrasive political shoutyness you get with ATR. It’s a nice touch that has me itching for the full length.
But what makes it even better is that you can get it free here. So don’t fucking bitch to me that you don’t get shit for nothin these days.
Iggy & The Stooges - Raw Power
Apparently there’s now a version of ‘strip’ Rock Band.
I’ve played strip Rock Band. Or wait, maybe that was just the time I had dinner with a guy then went back to his place where his housemates were having drinks & he tried teaching me how to play Rock Band but I got bored & just wanted to make out with him & then we had awesome sex on the sofa while his housemate was taking a leak. Eh. I’m really not that great at Rock Band anyway.
But my mistake. Do carry on.
Yes we are open! Well, kinda.
Look, don’t get on my case. That’s the thing about rejoining the ranks of the gainfully employed; less time = more money. And more money means I’m one step closer to annoying my boyfriend on a 24/7 basis. All day, everyday me….. how could it ever go wrong?
And unless you can match my salary - or send sympathetic donations to my poor unsuspecting man-friend - thing’s will likely continue to be more than a little patchy over here. So hold off on reminding me that I haven’t written about your shittacular whore of a girlfriend or why your boyfriend wants you to take a great big steamer on his chest. You know who you people are. Your time is coming.
Eventually.